February 6, 2014

Real Life: The Woods, the Woman and the Snowbrush, Part 1


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The life of a musician can be many things filled with songs to play and sing. Though personal experiences and perceptions will change from person to person one fact will remain. If there’s one thing you can guarantee a musician’s life will never be, its boring, dull or simply plain or any word that means the same! Ok Im done, sorry I haven’t wrote a poem in a LONG time. However this said poem is very true. For some reason my life is very ‘eventful’ to say the least. Not that Im complaining because I feel extremely blessed, but I do often find my self in the craziest situations asking, “Why me?” Honestly though, I’m enjoying the ride and in the end, everything always turns out alright. The best part is something is usually gained in some way from each experience and I’m left with new wisdom and a great story to tell….

So about a week ago I had a gig in Traverse City, Michigan. Now I could say something cleverly insulting about this town at this moment, but I’ll just refrain and remain tactful. So myself and the other musicians were already aware of how the roads are notoriously awful there when theres snow abound. Unfortunately on my way there I received news that some of us already had a really bad car accident and just like that we down two singers and down in spirit. So its about 10pm and I’m driving on, now with extra caution….right onto an unpaved seasonal road that started as a semi-plowed unpaved road I probably shouldn’t be on, and transitioned into something similar to a one lane bob sled track lined with a 3 ft wall of snow that I definitely shouldnt be on…. thank you Google Maps. Since I was at a point of no return I attempted to stay the course, even with the approaching hill ascending upwards into the night. Though Naomi (my car) fought hard, her front wheel drive was no match for the steep incline, and back down backwards we went, eventually slamming flush against the snow bank, now completely immobilized.

Well good thing I kept that damn roadside assistance right, because Ian, the assistance rep, has talked to Ian, the Michigan tow truck driver, who will be to me in about 40 minutes. Ok it could be worse…actually I started to wear my pajamas on the 5 hour drive and made a last minute switch to full layers and boots, I had water bottles, I had just filled up my tank, and bought 3 double cheeseburgers from Mcdonalds (don’t judge me), so I’ll just wait it out. So about an hour later, towing Ian calls, “Whats that Ian? Your truck is too big you say? Ian didn’t tell you the right road you say? You’d have to get a different rescue vehicle and technically your off now you say? Thanks for nothing Ian!” So I call back roadside assistance Ian whos already aware of the situation, “No one is answering you say? Your still trying other companies? Ok let me know when you have something Ian. Thanks for nothing Ian!” So at this point I’ve decided to problem solve and shovel with my snow brush and kick snow with my high kicking boots. I’m convinced I can dig myself out, so I start, but then I hear the crack of branches under weight in the surrounding woods and I’m quickly back in my car.

Its PITCH black, I can only see the 4 foot beam of the headlights that break into the slope of the hill before me. After a quick research project of surrounding wildlife, I presume that I’m quiet enough not to awake any bears and I could probably handle a coyote with this snow brush if needed so soon enough Im back out digging for an hour, ultimately to no avail, apparently Ian is having similar results, and apparently you have to be 100ft from a paved road to use roadside assistance and Ill have to pay upfront, ” Whats that Ian?, small print bull you say Ian?,That’s fine Ian, please get me the hell out of here Ian!” So fast forward and in comes band mate Zac to the rescue with a shovel in tow, borrowed from the hotel! We get to work and after some time passes we manage to get the car moving again, and suddenly again I’m hopeful. We try up the hill again, we try backwards again. Theres no use… The hill is more than she can handle, eventually shes stuck again and it becomes clear that, despite how adamantly against it I am, Naomi will have to stay for the night and we will try again when the sun is up. I finally get to my hotel room and collapse at around 3:40am………to be continued in part 2